Life is just seeming so… distant. I’m beginning to feel drawn out and under-used at my current temporary job. With everything going on, I feel like an absolute waste of life. I’ve worked so hard, studied even harder (despite things that made it emotionally, financially, and almost physically impossible to study) and fought my way all along so I could graduate. Now, all that time and money feels like it was a waste. I lost a good friend to suicide, I lost family that I was exceptionally close to, and I lost friendships because of stupidity on both our parts. Have I not sacrificed enough? I’ve spent so much time and effort to better myself, to try and be more confident, to be a hard worker, to be a great friend, to love and learn and everything else, but it has done nothing but hurt me. I’m patiently waiting, hoping, praying, and begging for something better.
Development on LetMeRant.com is coming along nicely. I keep coming up with some really great ideas. I’m working hard to get them implemented. There are a couple of algorithms I want to apply to it, as well as a few filters I want to put into place. I just keep coming up with great ideas for it.
Alright, I’m off to bed. Goodnight.